I’m More Like Dexter than You Think

Note: This article is a revised version of a post that originally appeared on an old blog of mine.

Scan 126

…and you very well might be, too.

 

If you’re not aware of the Showtime series Dexter, the premise is this: Dexter Morgan is a blood splatter analyst for the Miami-Metro Police Department. He also happens to be a vigilante serial killer whose victims are murderers that beat the system. Dexter’s desire to kill isn’t necessarily rooted in justice; he has an insatiable thirst to kill and just so happens to direct those urges towards ridding the world of those said scumbags. Obviously, there’s much more to it than that, and the character- so well performed by Michael C. Hall, is a complex one, to be sure.

So, you ask, just how am I like this butcherer? Well- let’s cut to the chase, shall we? (See what I did there?!)

The Trophy Case Dexter keeps blood slides from each of his victims in a nice oak box that he keeps hidden in the a/c unit in his apartment.

Just as each of Dexter’s blood slides tell a story, so too do the cards that I keep in my boxes.

Like that time that Richie Zisk came to the rescue as Julio Cruz was chasing a record.

Or the sad story of Rodney Craig.

Even the stories involving the lunkhead who refused to catch for the man whose name means ‘Peace’

The Code Dexter operates within a framework known as “The Code of Harry”- a set of guidelines his step-father, officer/detective Harry Morgan, set up for young Dexter to satisfy his need to kill and to channel those impulses for good. Other than a few exceptions (self-defense, mercy killing), he sticks closely to them. I, too, operate out of a set of guidelines. If I am going to go after a Mariners card, it must be:

  1. Topps’ flagship base set or an insert set from the flagship brand
  2. Be an odd-ball, food-issue, or regional issue
  3. Heritage or Archives Mariners base/inserts
  4. A player who appeared in a game with Seattle but didn’t make it in to one of the team sets I collect.

The Secrets People don’t know who -or what- Dexter is. It’s not like he goes around wearing his hobby on his sleeves. Even in the most intimate relationship of all- marriage- there are secrets. His wife doesn’t know how he spends his evenings- or where he really is (his old apartment). She thinks he’s overworked by the department and that he’s a recovering drug addict- not knowing his real addiction. I have a friend who, at one time, had a card shop and leased out a case to me to sell some of my stuff. I remember a co-worker of his, a fellow collector, who would come into the shop and would talk about the secret checking account that he had for his hobby dollars, which his wife was not aware of. Now, I haven’t gone to that extreme- but my wife probably doesn’t know the amount of time and money I spend on this hobby. Not that it’s a large sum that I try to keep hidden from her; she just knows that I keep a little out of our budget to play with. She would probably be more surprised to find out how much time I spend online in my apartment office, reading blogs, writing on my own blog, investigating the next potential victims for my collection. And, oh, I don’t have the burden of not sharing my hobby with others. Those closest to me couldn’t care less about it (they probably view it as childish- only are too charitable to say that to me); others, were they to find out I collect baseball cards would probably gasp in horror, as if I were some sort of…serial killer. I guess I could always order me a Topps Future Stars T-shirt, or a Panini/Donruss Rated-Rookie tee. That would probably get those looks of horror, alright.

Is there a television character that you would compare yourself to, as a collector?

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